Three of six XD!!

I've finished 3 of 6 pages of my mixed-media mini-comic. I started doing this to try to find myself a style which I want to work with for the coming months of high school, and so far I am really enjoying testing my limits artistically :). People who stop here regularly may be able to tell that I have some pretty serious problems with depression, which is why I am so excited about this project: it has given me something to do for so long that I haven't once felt anything but joy XD!

So here's my challenge for 2010 for those reading this: do something you love, and post your story online. I'm not sure how many people are actually going to read this, so my one request would be that once you have read this you repost the challenge on your own blog. I want to see just how far this can go, and just how much new, interesting stuff people can put out :D!!


Maybe, just maybe, this can make somebody else's life better too :)... I hope!

Signing off, ~Dreamer

So I've started to notice:

Has anybody else noticed that practically everybody born between about 1980 and now is incredibly angry, depressed, or both? Maybe that’s just what I want to see since that fits me too, but I can’t help but feel that there is a reason for this and that I’m not the only one who sees it…

Maybe I’m just out of my fucking mind too… always an option :P

So I feel like writing again... in a good way for once :)

In fact, I wrote a song last night for the first time since about the seventh grade :D! I’ll eventually get around to posting it, but I want to write the music to the words first… which will take a bit more time, as I never really learned to play guitar… I’m writing on the piano first, and then a friend will teach me guitar :).

As for the rest of life, fourteen fresh slashes in my left arm over the last few weeks probably says more about my mental state than any words I could use. Maybe that’s why I can write again; a need to try and elaborate on something which I can’t put into regular words. Or maybe I’m just too scared to say what I feel out loud…

Nonetheless, I hope I can keep on producing music, art, and anything else I wish for the weeks, months, and years to come :)!

WOW am I fucked... :/

Seriously, you know those situations where the only thing you can do is wait? This is one of them. Two girls, I'm in a relationship with one and I like her, I really do, but a girl whom I knew long before her has come back into my life... and is starting to win me over whether she wants to or not.

What can I DO?! And damn it, why do her eyes have to stay in my head?



Midori... yeah, I'll call her that. Thank you Murakami Haruki for once again providing a poignant picture of my life... my very messy life... :/

I miss people... :(

My sister is gone in college, my girlfriend is in Boston for a bit, my cousin left a little while ago... I want to see my best friend in VA, but we are both always busy...

I miss my three good friends, I miss the one who is probably the only person to read this stupid crap, I miss people period!

*sigh...*

I'm back :D!!! (aka: I'm not dead yet :P)

I'm back to the ol' blog... seems like it's gathered a bit of dust in my time away, as things are much different nowadays than they were.

First, I am now the proud boyfriend of the girl whom I was unsure how to react to, and I'm slowly but surely learning how to do so. We've been dating for over 4 months now and so far I've tried my hardest to be good to her :).

As for my friends, at least I know for sure who those are now. I honestly was really depressed at first as I started to realize just how few of the people I trusted trusted me in return, but I feel much better now knowing that I have those few people in my life who DO stand by me through everything... including suicidal depression...

And to those whom it may concern, I finally found a copy of "Wuthering Heights" in my house if you still want or need it at this point :P!

Call me Dr. Manhattan...

... because people make no sense to me. Seriously, apparently I made he cry. CRY! I didn't even get to say anything because well... I wasn't sure what to say...

I don't want her to be hurt, I really don't, but what can I do? I can't say yes, I can't say no. The logical thing to do would have been to keep this between us, but that didn't happen... Instead I was the only one who didn't realize, because I'll be damned if I get how other people work :(. That sounds a bit strange. I won't literally be sent to hell for understanding others, but I just physically CAN'T! There's a disconnect somewhere for me between where logical reactions end and human reactions begin...

She was CRYING dammit, and I still can't do a thing... can't say a thing...

help...